Grumpy Old Wufei's Prank Caller
by Dark Neko Shinigami
Summary: Just a ficlet that I wrote in hopes of getting over my writers block. Rated for language, though it isn't too bad R & R onegai!! :) I don't own Matlock either.. forgot to mention that. o.O


*I don't own Gundam Wing, or prank callers.*  
  
AN: This is just another ficlit to accompany my Grumpy Old Gundam Series. Hopefully this will help me over come my writers block. ^^v  
  
  
Grumpy Old Wufei's Prank Caller.  
  
  
It was eight o'clock. Well past time for any normal person to be in bed and be asleep. Oh no, only the crazy or the deviant would be up past Matlock. So here we are, five minutes past eight o'clock on a tuesday night, another satisfying rerun of our favorite lawyer show having lulled us into dreamlan...*Ring*  
  
"Snort... grumble... mmrrff....zzz.." Wufei chirped happily as he buried his face into the pillow.  
  
Moments passed.  
  
*Ring!*  
  
Grumbling softly, a knarled hand reached out and took the receiver. "Injustice?" The elderly chinese man asked politely.  
  
Heavy breathing could be heard, along with a low, devious voice. Then a giggle, followed by a few suggestions.  
  
"INJUSTICE! KISAMA! How dare you call me at such a late hour and degrade my integrity! I shall.... coward. You hung up. Onna.. weakling.. weak damn.. weakling..zzzz.."  
  
Quatre, who had gone in search of some iced tea, shuffled slowly past Wufei's door. "Who was on the phone?"  
  
"Weakling... weak damn... matlock was good tonight."  
  
Quatre looked at him oddly for a moment, before pushing his specticals back up his nose. "Oh, I do agree it was good.. " He left it at that, then carried on down the hall on his journey of iced tea goodness and all that came from that.  
  
Ah, back to the peace and quiet that only 8:20 p. m. could bring us. The crickets were chirping merrily, snores were heard from the dark room known as Shinigami's cave. Heero was thankful that his boobs had gone away and our brave, courageous hero Wufei was settled back in for his slumb... *Ring*  
  
"mmmrrff... grunt.. snore... mumble."  
  
*Ring!"  
  
Again, the elderly ex-pilot reached out apon his emaculate dresser to lift the reciever ever so grumpily from the cradle. "Injustice?!" He wasn't as cheerful as he was the first time he answered.  
  
More giggling insued this time, along with a few suggestive comments and one very rude question.  
  
"Lace!? Now why the hell would I wear lace *There*? Who are you!? Why if I get my hands on you, I'll.... damn.. he hung up."  
  
"What the hell are you doing up this late with your damn callers calling like that?" Heero grumped as he creaked slowly to Chang's doorway. "I'm an old man.. I need sleep! Sleep I say! I don't get sleep, I get mean.. you don't want me mean... your ringers too loud on your phone.. what are ya, deaf, ya old man? Uh oh.. gotta go." And with those kind words of concern, the ex-Wing pilot shambled slowly to his room to a much needed and much deserved potty break.  
  
Ahem. Once again, we are transported *Back* into the land of a peaceful summer night. The time, 8:30 p.m.   
  
Quatre settled his body slowly on the bed, turning his gentle face to the elderly pilot of Heavyarms. Carefully removing his circular, wire rimmed specticles, he sighed deeply.  
  
"Trowa?"  
  
"Nn....?"  
  
"You know how he gets when he's riled up after 8:00 p.m.... why *Must* you bait him so?"  
  
A long thoughtful silence descended the tidy room.  
  
"Trowa?"  
  
"... ....?"  
  
"I asked you a question... are you doing this to drive me crazy? You know I'm the first person he grabs and blithers to when angered."  
  
"... ..... .... . .... ...!!!"  
  
"Don't you *Dare* take that tone of voice with me! You will cease this nonsense immediately!"  
  
Trowa nodded softly, sliding under the covers as Quatre did so as well. After a moment, he leaned slowly over the side of the bed and pulled out a box.   
  
"Look.." He gingerly pulled out a stunned bird from the box.  
  
"We have *GOT* to do something about that gas problem of yours, Barton. The wildlife officials are starting to get suspicious.. not to mention the staff.. You've sent two nurses alone to the emergency room." Winner sighed with mild exasperation.  
  
Trowa watched as his blond friend slowly slipped to sleep, then he reached over and carefully lifted the reciever, dialing quickly and trying to hide a snicker.  
  
Deep in the peaceful slumber of Shinigami's cave, Duo lay sprawled on his back. A long curtain of silver hair lay spread in an almost etheral glow as dim starlight shown down apon the lusterous locks. Locked away in a happy dreamland, he snoozed in utmost peac... *Ring*  
  
"Snrrrzzt.. wha?"  



End file.
